You know we all want to change the world. Aptly written by John Lennon. I want a revolution, for sure. I'm leading the charge for anyone who wants be powerful without being pushy!
Nobody want to speak up
Speaking up is complicated, some say. Most people, maybe you, envision someone getting a gleam in their eye, straightening their back and taking in a breath to give someone else a good piece of their mind with a righteous tone. Possibly yelling. A real table thumper. That’s their view of being assertive.
And, I can’t say I blame you if that’s your view, too. I got the 'don't fight' message at home and at school. I was told to 'let the teacher' take care of it. Meaning, don't speak up for yourself- wait for someone else to do it (or suffer quietly).
If you learned something similar, here's a chance to turn that around. You can be assertive and powerful in your own life without being pushy, mean or feeling guilty.
Speaking up is about
saying what’s true….
Speaking up doesn’t have to be loud to be powerful. In fact, a whisper at the right moment catches everyone’s attention. (Remind me to tell you the one about the frat boys I once lived with)
I love how my VA Melissa speaks up to me. She’s clear & friendly. Without apology or guilt, lets me know when I’ve crossed a line for her.
Our working relationship could’ve been doomed by my ‘last minute ideas-itis’. She could've kept quiet and played along, getting more frustrated by me until she fired me. But she chose to speak up to me.
Now, I know that she likes her weekends free and wants more big picture so she can plan her work and mine. She doesn't yell or make me feel bad and I get the message. She set a kind boundary!
Why Speaking up works
Saying your truth works for your small business because you and your client have the same goals. Your livelihood rests on doing great work together. You know that but your client may not understand his or her end of the deal. Like what they need to do (or not) to get the result they want.
That means it’s your job as the self-employed person to be the thought leader and set kind boundaries for your clients.
Melissa and I both understand that to get the very best product (and she’s fab, let me tell you) there have to be kind boundaries set on both sides- client and trusted adviser.
How do you speak up to your clients and set kind boundaries?